Terms of Service: The Rules of Regret

Welcome to the contract nobody reads.

By accessing, browsing, or accidentally clicking on PunSpill, you acknowledge that you have read, understood, and agreed to be bound by these Terms.

If you do not agree with these terms, please close this tab immediately, go outside, touch some grass, and forget you ever saw this place. Your brain cells will thank you.

1. Acceptance of the “Cringe”

The Agreement: By staying on this website, you legally admit that you have terrible taste in humor. You acknowledge that the puns found here may cause excessive groaning, eye-rolling, and a sudden loss of popularity among your friends.

You agree to hold PunSpill (and its founder, Umer) harmless for any awkward silences caused by using our jokes in real life.

2. Intellectual Property (Please Don’t Steal Our Trash)

The Copyright Rule: All content on this website (including text, graphics, logos, and the soul-crushing puns) is the property of PunSpill.

  • Can you share them? Yes. Please inflict these jokes on your friends. That is literally why we exist.
  • Can you copy-paste our entire site? No. If you scrape our content to build your own AI-generated humor site, we will find you. And by “we,” we mean Gerald, our Head of HR. He bites.

3. User Conduct (Don’t Be That Guy)

The “Be Nice” Clause: If you leave comments or interact with the site, you agree to follow these simple rules:

  1. No Hate Speech: We are here to roast vegetables with puns, not people.
  2. No Spam: Do not try to sell us crypto in the comments. We have no money.
  3. No Explaining the Joke: If you have to explain it, it failed. Let it die in peace.

We reserve the right to ban any user who takes these jokes seriously or kills the vibe.

4. Limitation of Liability (The “Not Our Fault” Clause)

The “We Warned You” Rule: To the fullest extent permitted by law, PunSpill shall not be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential damages resulting from your use of this site.

Specific scenarios we are NOT liable for:

  • Your girlfriend breaking up with you after you sent her 15 “Rat Puns” in a row.
  • Getting fired for laughing at a “Dirty Santa Joke” during a Zoom meeting.
  • Physical injury caused by face-palming too hard.

You use these puns at your own risk.

5. Third-Party Links

The “Wild West” Rule: Our website may contain links to third-party websites (like Amazon, Instagram, or Pinterest). If you click a link and buy a T-shirt that says “I Love Opossums,” that is between you and your wallet. We are not responsible for what happens once you leave the safety of our chaos.

6. Modifications to Terms

The “We Changed Our Minds” Rule: We reserve the right to change these terms at any time without notice. We might add a rule tomorrow that says “Everyone must send Umer a dollar.” It probably won’t hold up in court, but we might try it. It is your responsibility to check this page periodically (which we know you won’t do).

7. Severability

If any part of these Terms is found to be unenforceable (because a judge didn’t like our jokes), that part will be ignored, but the rest of these Terms will remain in full effect. Basically, if one rule breaks, the rest of the contract still stands.

Still Here? Congratulations, you made it to the bottom of the Terms of Service. You get nothing.

If you have a legitimate legal concern (or if you just want to yell at us for Rule #4), please visit the Complaint Department.

Frequently Ignored Rules

We know you didn’t read the text above.

Can I sue you if I die of laughter?

Technically, no. Medical experts agree that our jokes are not funny enough to be lethal. You are safe.

I wrote this pun in 2012! You stole it!

It’s a pun about a cat. It wasn’t original in 2012, and it’s not original now. We’re all just recycling the same trash. Welcome to the internet.

Can I use these puns in my wedding vows?

You can, but we strongly advise against it unless you have signed a prenuptial agreement.

Who wrote these terms?

A very tired human and an AI that is slowly learning sarcasm.