Congratulations. You have clicked on the most boring link of “Privacy Policy” on the entire internet.
If you are reading this, you are either a lawyer, a bot, or someone with absolutely nothing better to do. Regardless, we value your privacy. Mostly because we are too lazy to spy on you, and frankly, we don’t want to know what else you search for.
Here is how we handle your data at PunSpill.
1. The Cookie Policy (The Big Letdown)
This website uses cookies to enhance user experience and analyze traffic.
No, not the chocolate chip kind.
We use digital cookies. Unfortunately, these are text files that track where you click, not delicious baked goods. We are as disappointed as you are.
- Why we use them: To see which puns make you leave the site immediately.
- Can you disable them? Yes. You can turn off cookies in your browser settings. It won’t stop the bad jokes, but it will stop us from knowing you were here.
2. What Data We Collect
We collect non-personally identifiable information such as browser type, language preference, and referring site.
But we know you use Chrome.
We don’t know who you are, and we don’t want to. We only collect basic stats to prove to our parents that people actually visit this site.
- What we see: “Someone from Ohio visited the Capybara page.”
- What we DON’T see: Your name, your address, or why you needed “Rat Puns” at 3 AM. Your embarrassing search history is safe with us.
3. Third-Party Services (The Snitches)
We utilize third-party services like Google Analytics and AdSense which may collect data.
Google watches you. We just watch Google.
We use tools like Google Analytics to look at colorful charts.
- Google: They know everything.
- Us: We just look at a line going up or down and pretend we understand business.
- Ads: If you see an ad for “Therapy,” that’s probably Google targeting you because you spent too much time reading our puns. That’s not on us.
4. Selling Your Data
We do not sell, trade, or transfer your Personally Identifiable Information to outside parties.
Nobody wants to buy your data.
Let’s be honest. A list of “People who like Opossum Memes” is not exactly a hot commodity on the black market. Your data is safe with us, mostly because:
- We have morals.
- We don’t know how to sell data.
- Gerald (our Opossum HR rep) ate the hard drive.
5. External Links
This site contains links to other sites. We are not responsible for their content.
The “Not Our Problem” Clause.
Sometimes we link to other websites (like Instagram or Pinterest or any other). Once you click that link and leave PunSpill, you are in the wild. If you click a link and end up buying a weird T-shirt, don’t look at us.
6. Updates to This Policy
We reserve the right to modify this privacy policy at any time.
We might change our minds.
If we decide to change this policy (like if we actually start baking real cookies), we will update this page. But let’s be real, you aren’t going to come back and check.
Still Paranoid? If you have questions about your data (or just want to yell at a cloud), you can contact Umer, our Chief Regret Officer.
The Tin Foil Hat Section
Because someone, somewhere, thinks we are the FBI.
Can you see me through my webcam right now?
No. But please put on a shirt. It’s for your own good.
Will you tell my boss I’m reading puns at work?
We won’t tell them, but your sudden drop in productivity might give it away. If you get fired, you can come work for us. (We pay in exposure).
Is Gerald the Opossum stealing my credit card info?
Gerald doesn’t know how to use a computer. He is interested in half-eaten sandwiches, not identity theft. Your money is safe.
Why am I seeing ads for “Therapy”?
That is Google’s algorithm reacting to the amount of time you’ve spent reading our “Dad Jokes.” Take the hint.
Do you track my location?
We know roughly where you are (e.g., “Earth”). Beyond that, we don’t care. We aren’t coming over for dinner.
