Listen, it is cold outside. You are probably huddled under three blankets trying to distract yourself from the fact that the air hurts your face. We get it. You need a distraction, and apparently, you have decided that reading terrible wordplay is the way to go. We have compiled a list of winter humor so bad it might actually lower the temperature in the room. If you are looking for highbrow comedy, please leave immediately.
📑 A Flurry of Bad Content
Absolute Zero Chill: Funny Snow Puns
The white stuff is falling from the sky, and traffic is already a nightmare. While you are stuck inside waiting for the plow, you might as well annoy your family with these quips. If you need something to keep your hands warm while scrolling, grab a mug and read our coffee dad jokes because caffeine is the only thing keeping society together right now.
Cold Weather Puns That Are Negative Degrees of Funny
When the temperature drops, our standards for humor drop with it. It is miserable out there, so let us make it miserable in here too. If you are planning to hibernate until spring like a sensible mammal, you should probably check out our bear puns to learn from the masters of sleeping through the bad weather.
Abominable Snowman Jokes for Frozen Friends
Building a sentient man out of frozen water is a weird human tradition, but we do it anyway. The hardest part is finding a carrot for the nose without looking like you are raiding a garden. Speaking of gardens, if you want more vegetation humor, our dirty plant puns are right there waiting for you.
Winter Sport Puns for People Who Fall Down
Some people pay money to strap sticks to their feet and slide down mountains. We do not understand it, but we respect the hustle. If you prefer sports where you do not risk hypothermia, maybe read our pickleball jokes instead, because at least that is played on a flat surface.
Cozy Indoor Puns for Introverts
The best part of snow is having an excuse to never leave your house. You can sit by the fire, wrap yourself in wool, and ignore the world. If you are really into the whole yarn aesthetic, our puns about knitting will stitch you right up.
Blizzard Puns for When It Won’t Stop
Sometimes it snows so much you literally cannot see your own car. That is when you know nature is angry. It is almost as cold as deep space out there. If you want to nerd out while you are trapped inside, go read our Star Wars dad jokes and pretend you are on the planet Hoth.
Frosty Names for White Pets
If you got a white dog, cat, or hamster and you need to name it something obvious, we have you covered. These are unoriginal, but they get the job done.
You named your pet after the weather. How creative. Here are names for your little snowball.
Corny Snow Dad Jokes
You asked for them. Or maybe you didn’t. Either way, here are the Question and Answer jokes that will make your children audibly groan.
Short Snow Captions for Instagram
You took a selfie in the cold. Your nose is red. You need a caption so people know you went outside today.
The Big Freeze Finale
Well, you made it to the bottom. We hope you are happy with the brain cells you lost reading these snow puns. Go drink something warm and try to forget this ever happened.
Rating of Regret: 9/10 Hypothermic Cringes.
The Icy Inquiries
Why are snow jokes so bad?
Because they are usually recycled trash that leaves everyone feeling cold and empty inside.
Can I tell these jokes at a party?
Only if you want people to leave early so you can go back to bed.
What is the difference between a snow pun and a dad joke?
The delivery. Dad jokes are told with pride; snow puns are told with a deep sense of shame.
Will reading these make me warmer?
No, but the rage might raise your blood pressure enough to generate some body heat.
